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Tuesday, June 15, 2010

My old image and current. Different, very different.

People always thought that I am a sombong girl. I don't know why they think that way but the real truth is, no I'm not that kind of person. Try to be my friend, more exactly, my close friends, you'll know the true me.


Hari tu, last day punya appointment dekat Assunta Hospital, I met my ex-schoolmate, Rahimunnisha Rizal (najmah and pika confirm kenal dia). She's a girl lah, though her name is kinda weird and rare. I came quite late for the appointment so kena lah tunggu pasal Assunta ni pakai prinsip first come first serve (haha boleh pulak camtuh). So while waiting, aku cam biasa suka peek in the room tengok patient semua tengah buat time kena interrogate dengan doctor. Biasa kalau kaitan dengan neurology ni sangat interesting la dia punya check up. So saje2 mahu tengok apa doctor buat heheh. Time tengah2 peek in tiba2, aku nampak seorang nurse ni, muka macam kenal jer. Very3 familiar face for me. Lepas tengok 2-3 kali, confirm tuh Nisha (that girl that I was talking about).

At first I kinda have some doubts untuk tegur dia. Sebab by looking at my past, I wasn't really in a good term with my ex-schoolmates, well kinda with most of them. So yes, I decided to berpura2 tak nampak dia. I think she saw me too tapi took the same action as I did. She seems like wanting to approach me but something seems like preventing her from doing that. I'm not really sure what it is but one thing I kinda sure, it's my previous image that she had on me.

Kalau2 dulu2 aku nampak dia, aku akan pura2 tak kenal. Senyum pun tidak as if I don't know her at all. Pattern aku lah kalau nampak orang dulu2. Memang confirm buat muka tak kenal. Kalau orang sapa pun buat muka acuh tak acuh. But mostly people were scared nak tegur aku. Memang tengok muka aku mereka dah cap muka sombong haha.

So back to the story. Aku pun usha lah dia sikit2, sipi2 macam tuh. Dalam hati memang terasa sangat nak tegur dia tapi badan aku memang tak gerak langsung. So aku pandang2 camtuh je la. Dia pun mula2 pandang2 aku jugak tapi at last kami dua2 mengelak nak pandang antara satu sama lain. Trying to act as if we don't know each other.

So after almost 3 hours we acted that way, finally my name been called. Aku pun apa lagi, memang time tuh dalam hati dah pasang niat kuat nak tegur dia. Aku bukan aku yag dulu lagi. Kalau aku dulu memang langsung pura2 tak nampak. Tapi aku sekarang memang tak macam tuh. At least sekadar berbasa-basi bak kata orang melayu, pun cukup lah. So finally, I make my step untuk tegur dia. And to my real surprised, dia sambut sapaan aku dengan ramah, sangat ramah. And we talked like, as if we have known each other for a looong time. She was like didn't really expect me to tegur her that way. We talked about our current life and everything.

So yeah, there goes my old image. Aku bukan sombong ye, itu sangat pasti. Aku sebenarnya boleh je cakap dengan sesiapa but my old image, really kinda haunting me. Aku pernah jumpa ramai ex-schoolmates, tapi semua macam taknak tegur sapa dengan aku, like seriously. I might need to meet them again, get to know them again. I'm not like what I used to be. I am the new me now :)

p/s: post ni takde kaitan langsung dengan status facebook aku "I'll never be the same, if we ever meet again". Status yang tuh got other meaning. Well, the true meaning is, let me keep that to myself :)

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