Saturday, March 13, 2010

Being feminine

To start off, I was never really a feminine girl before. Starting from the age I reached my puberty, up till I started my life in cenfos, I was never a feminine girl. I don't know how to dress, I never know anything about makeups, and plus, my tudungs were always been white or black or cream, like forever.

I was always seen with my selekeh image whenever I'm in class. Been searching for my own identity for quite a long time I guess. And and and, another plus point, I looked like a nerd by having braces on my teeth (=_=)". And not to forget with all the pimples on my face.

Probably the causes of these things, was because I am from a girl school, who was never get involved with boys, who was never really care on how I looked like when presenting myself on public. I never care, probably.

I think I started to be more feminine when I started having Aqilah and Izzati as my roommates. I clearly remembered, I never get to touched those mascaras, lipsticks, eyeliners and all those makeups things when I was with my previous roommates. It's not that I don't want to use it, it's just there's no one to teach me, no one to show me the way how to use it. My previous roommates weren't really those people who wear makeups.

The products that I used for my facial care, also varies from time to time. I clearly remembered the first product I ever used was clean and clear. Never and forever will ever favour that product. Don't ask why but one thing for sure, those very chemically products, just don't suit my face. The next product that I have used was Safi Balqis, if I'm not mistaken. Used it for quite a while and get sick of it in not quite a long time. Cuz, it gave no changes to my face, at all. My face was still having lots of pimples and still oily and everything. The next product that I used was Natasha Gold. I was very satisfied with this product, like seriously. My pimples were lessen and my face was less oily. But I stopped using that product after awhile. Dunno why. Probably because already bored of using it. After that, the intention to use another product was getting stronger, so I decided to used Bio-essence, Tanaka White. The product was good also, I think. But I wasn't really satisfied with that product because my pimples were back at that time. After thinking quite a long time, I quit using Tanaka White, and started to use Bio-essence Pine Pollen up till now. Got interest to use that because of my sisters. Well, my family just have this kind of interest in Bio-essence products. I just don't quite know why. But I think bio-essence is okay laa.

Oh, already mentioned that I started to be more feminine when I started to be roomies with Aqilah and Izzati, which I can consider as quite true. They're the one who teach me on how to use makeups. Aqilah was the one who influenced me to start wearing shawls or selendang. And I started to care more on hygiene. I started to buy more blouses that suits me more cuz the ones that I had before, weren't really suit me. I started to use varies of tudungs. And started to talk, walk, act, and even laugh like a girl (please minus the gossiping parts please haha). Been moreee girlish than I have ever been before.

The truth is, I love the way I am right now, compare to what I was before. A girl should be like a girl. A girl never should act like a guy. Probably some of you think that because of my siblings are all girls, means that I should be more girlish, I think your thoughts are wrong. I never ever learn to be girlish with them. In fact, I try to act tough when I am with them. I remembered that we used to laugh to each other when someone is crying while watching the sad movies or stories. I never really get to cry when watching those sad movies while I was a little kid, even I am those kind of person who will cry when watching sad movies. And I used to have this rock-ish style which doesn't suits me at all, I guess. But hey, I still listen to rock music :D

Be yourself, be feminine. Confidence is an essential thing in order to make yourself be more attractive in the eyes of others. I used to be a low self-esteem person but I think things are getting better right now. Never be ashamed of yourself. There's something in your inner-self that never fails to attract others. It's just some of them just failed to see the special thing in us. Be yourself, be more confident!

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